Sunday, July 31, 2005

2003 - Microsoft Supports XP

Windows XP support outsourced to New Jersey

Dear Consumas:
It has come ta our attention dat a cupola copies udda Windows XP NewJoisey Edition may have been shipped outsida Joisey.

If youse got one a dese, you may need some help unnerstanin da commands. Da Joisey edition may be recognized by da unique openin' screen. It reads:

"Windas XP", wit a background pitcha a Hoboken. When youse start da program, instead a da usual hary stringy like music, you hear a little Springsten. It's also shipped wit a Sopranos screen sava.

Please also note:

Recycle bin is labeled "Newark"
My Computer is called "My Friggin' Computa"
The Inbox is referred to as "Da Trunk"
Deleted items are referred to as "Wacked", "Erased" or "Rubbed Out"
Control Panel is known as "Da Bosses

"Performing an "illegal operation" is known as "Enhancin' da Family Business" and will actually maximize da program instead a shuttin' it down

Hard Drive is referred to as "Da Turnpike on Da Way to Da Shore"

Instead of an error message, "You Ain't Gonna Friggin' Believe Dis'" pops up.

Changes in Terminology in Da Joisey Edition:
OK .. . . . Sure ting
Cancel . . . . Fugeddaboudit
Reset . . . . Start ova
Yes . . . . Yeah
No . . . . Nah
Find . . . . Put a Contract Out On
Browse . . . . Get a Looksee
Back . . . .. U-Toin
Help . . . . Get Your Own Friggin' Ansa
Stop . . . . Knock it Off
Start . . . . Move it
Settings . . . . Here's da Rules

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you mistakenly got a copy of the Joisey Edition.

You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.

You gotta problem wit dat?

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