Sunday, July 31, 2005

Christmas in July 2003

What do they call Santa's helpers?
Subordinate Clauses

What do you call Santa Clause after he's fallen into a fireplace?

Krisp Kringle

Who sings "Love Me Tender" and makes Christmas toys?
Santa's little Elvis

Which of Santa's reindeers needs to mind his manners the most?
"Rude"olph

Where do Santa's reindeers like to stop for lunch?
Deery Queen

What do you call the fear of getting stuck while sliding down a chimney? Santa Claus-trophobia

The 4 stages of man:
He believes in Santa Claus.
He doesn't believe in Santa Claus.
He is Santa Claus.
He looks like Santa Claus.

What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish

What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
Fleece Navidad

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite

What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?

Ribbon hood

Why was Santa's little helper depressed?

Because he had low elf esteem.

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